Lesson V: Very Hot by Diet Kong

Time to set the scene. You play a show with your band in the afternoon on St. Patrick's Day. After a long day of setting up, playing, breaking down, and then the two hour drive you find yourself at yet another gig in New York City at Arlene's Grocery. As you enter the club and put your gear behind the stage, you meet the next band going on. A man in a black suit that has been painted white with what looks to be house paint, not to mention that this man has a rope tied around his head, greets you with a smile. His greeting of a friendly "Hello boys" seemed genuine enough. A round of handshakes and he says he must be getting onto the stage now, dumps a bottle of baby powder onto his head, and then steps into the frantic oblivion of an already rolling live show. This is Keith and his band is Diet Kong. That's the story of how was introduced to this band and they rock asses.

Their song, "Very Hot," had us singing the hook the whole way home to Philly that night, scatting the words over and over. On the play by play breakdown, "Very Hot" starts with an intro that could grab the ears of any music fan from NIN to BIG. The first line of vocals to come in are nice falsetto lines that remind me of why I love Dr. Dog so God damn much. And the verse melody is real sweet, with a touch of falsetto here and there cleverly woven into the lines. And then there's the hook.

It comes in strong and relieves the tension of the syncopation and dynamic of the verse. You can almost envision the warehouse of pogo-ing ravers that this hook seems to call out to. It's easily memorable and it totally makes you want to dance. Just when you think you're going to get a guitar solo over electronic drums that just makes you want to slap whoever first melded hip hop and rock for helping to ruin both genres, he calls the pump fake and drops back to the hook. A strong song from a strong band, this could totally be a summer time hit. You know one of those songs that you loved in April when no one cared and then you want to kill people when you hear it in August? Then five years later, it reminds you of the summer of 2007 and you get all teary eyed? Yeah that's the kind of shit I mean.

Check these guys out, their videos are fucking AMAZING and the songs kick total ass too.....

Here's some links...

MYSPACE

Much Love in the Evil Sound by Diet Kong

Lesson IV: Makes Me Wonder by Maroon 5

I did this song because it's the number one single on the Billboard Hot 100. That's the only reason.

Unfortunately America, this is the most lame generic bullshit I have ever heard from this band. I like a lot of their stuff but this one is a Jamoriqui rip off from the get go, except without the coolness. The guitar tones are weak, Adam Levine isn't using his voice to it's full potential, and the hook blows. The drums are either a machine or they sound like shit, I couldn't stand to take a double listen to this piece of shit. Seriously, this is the number one single on the Billboard Hot 100 and it is recycled, computerized, and generally lame. It makes me shed at least a single tear.

On the other hand, I just got Love Supreme by John Coltrane and it's still hot and no one gives a fuck. You can check out Maroon 5's new video right here.

Lesson III: Computer Blue by Prince

You all know "Doves Cry," "Let's Go Crazy," and "Purple Rain" from the motion picture by the one and only Duke of All That is Music: Prince. But "Computer Blue" from the same album is a face fucker indeed whether you know it or not. If you don't you should really get out there and dig on it because it rocks my box.

First, let's talk Prince for a second. My friend Rob put it best when he said "An alien could land at 3121 and give Prince their version of a musical instrument and he'd write a hit song on it in fifteen minutes. Enough said.

"Computer Blue" starts off with an intro riff that exemplifies the less is more strategy and is nicely reintroduced in the chorus. It has all the makings of an awesome Prince song from the get go including the synth sound which screams panty melter. The guitar part, you know the one I'm talking about, where he repeats that one fast line over and over again right after the chorus...yeah I play a lot of guitar and that shit is amazing. Not only is it catchy as hell as well as genius but it's hard as hell to play. And then after the chorus it changes up. You get a nice pressure relieving trip to a guitar solo, again less is more, over what almost sounds like Scarface music. And the resolution of the guitar solo on those high and sustained notes that lead into the outro instrumental chorus as goosebump inducing. The final Prince scream and unaccompanied outro solo are totally 100% kickass. If you don't know this song, get it right now.


You're still reading......go listen........go!

Lesson II: Dashboard by Modest Mouse

Ok so everyone remembers Float On and how they all backed into a cop car that summer and everything was just great, right? If you don't you can't remember an awesome hook and probably don't even really like music because my face was fucked all summer by saturation.

Now, I have a lot of friends who really dug Good News for People Who Love Bad News who told me that all the new stuff they heard from Modest Mouse sucked.....well guess what? You suck!

Their newest single "Dashboard" is fucking great (so is the rest of the album but that's another blog.) I think one of the main reasons is that tasty guitar licking courtesy of the Smith's Johnny Marr who recently joined the band. His pinky work combined with lead vocalist Isaac Brock's amazing job at suttering, scratching, and belching his unique voice so it becomes part of the groove. All the breakdowns are sweet as candy and the staccato-ness (I know not a word.....yet) of the entire tune is really the killer for me because a dance song that's so stiff in it's individual parts but so fluid in it's entirety is the balls bro.

If any of your friends tell you this new album stinks, tell them they stink and punch them in the eye. Then go out and get the newest release from your boys Modest Mouse.

Lesson I: Old Ways by Dr. Dog

This is really one of my favorite bands of all time. I know that sounds a little ridiculous for a band so recent to be in the top rankings but guess what, you're only confused because you never heard these guys.

The Dog has been rocking it for some years now although I was unaware of them until recently finding their critically acclaimed 2005 release "Easy Beat." Their subsequent release, February's "We All Belong" is just as amazing and I'm going to geek out on their newest single "Old Ways."
From the very beginning of the track, just the use of the damper pedal alone is genius. It comes in with a nice amount of flare and crashes only to do what the Dog does best but dynamically drop into a groove of woodblock and harmonies.
The hook is just great, it's memorable, the lyrics are relevant, and it dives right back into the intro for a second or two before going back to the verse which is also awesome as all hell. Then the break where everything drops to the guitars, the tension that the semi-hollow analog tube guitar sounds make when they crash into the Nord keyboard makes this tone geeks goosebumps get boners. If you can't dig on the Dog, you don't dig. Go buy some of their shit.